May 2013
My gender is pizza because everyone wants a piece of me
masticatingtocorn:
lameborghini:
people are gross i want to be a dog
dogs lick their own ass
cornchipz:
awkwardcontent:
Fun fact: Humans are deuterostomes, which means that when they develop in the womb the anus forms before any other opening. Which basically means at one point you were nothing but an asshole.
some people never develop beyond this stage
chekhov:
Today I put my hand in my backpack and felt a stress ball and I was like “oh? I have a stress ball?” and I squeezed it and it was a pear and it exploded and now I’m much more stressed than I was earlier :/
internetexplorers:
why hasn’t anyone offered my parents 5 camels for my hand in marriage yet what am i doing wrong
started from the bottom and i am currently still at the bottom
neopetspremium:
blackii17:
neopetspremium:
I !!!!!!!!!
WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TO!!!!!!!!!!!!1
BE!!!!!!!!!!!
HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻
PUT THE FUCKING TABLE BACK!!
┬──┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ)
snapchatting:
my life would probably get 2 notes
I would never cheat in a relationship
because that would require two people finding me attractive.
saddumbgirl:
idk if you say possesive things like “you’re mine” i get all melty and weird and will probably fall in love with you
oli-twist:
windspray:
how do i get a flat stomach by tomorrow
Societal expectations of sex don't make any sense
swag-canada:
fictionaladyfeels:
salmiakkivodka:
If dudes are expected to have a lot of sex
But ladies are expected to stay virgins until marriage
But homosexuality is bad
I’m really confused who dudes are supposed to be having all that sex with
#i’m not saying its aliens #but
rneerkat:
shinykonyta:
rneerkat:
i love being pregnant because i can eat whatever i want and people wont question me about it :)
you are a 19 yr old boy
youre stereotyping me
frickingstyles:
i will never understand the logic of screaming as loud as possible at a concert like wow you finally get to see them live in concert let’s make sure no one hears them at all
mormondad:
if you see a plus sign next to my url when someone reblogged something from me click on it and you will become a millionaire trust me this is not a scam
April 2013
“The person who tries to keep everyone happy often ends up feeling the loneliest.”
– Unknown (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
i hate the feeling when you’re talking to someone you love and you feel nothing but annoying and dumb
